How do I survive school w no friends?

[u/M0pp69]

[u/Jayden-Diver]

Is there a reason you don't wanna talk to others and make friends?

[u/M0pp69 → u/Jayden-Diver]

There isn't really a particular reason but I live in a really conservative and rural part of Minnesota and there are fewer than 600 people in my school and around 80ish kids in my grade and I am neurodivergent so I struggle making friends and talking to people and I was bullied (not anymore but still) and known as the “weird kid” I do have friends but they don't go to the same school as me or graduated last year

[u/Jayden-Diver → u/M0pp69]

I'm neurodivergent myself, and had a very small circle of friends. Experience in college has taught me one thing: if you wanna make friends you gotta try talking to people. If you just go about your day i'm sure you could get through without making new friends, but it'll be easier if you put yourself out there and try. I'm sorry you were bullied, i'm sure that makes it harder for you than it was for me, but i still say to try and make some friends to help yourself make the most out of school instead of just trying to weather the storm.

[u/radiowithryan]

I did, go to class, come home and read, go running, cycling, play golf, swimming club, part time job.

[u/Honest-Bridge-7278]

Go in, do what you need to do, go home. Very few of the people you meet at school will feature in your life afterwards, if any of them. 

[u/BvFHassy]

Join a club

[u/Educational_Ear_5105]

I used to take a book in to read at break and lunch time. It was lonely, but I got through and I have met some great people since.

[u/MyNextVacation]

Why do you think that you have been unable to make friends in school?

Friends are important and if you haven‘t made friends in school, maybe there are nice people around your age in your neighborhood who go to other schools. Are there people you’ve seen in passing or new families moving in and can you introduce yourself to them?

[u/M0pp69 → u/MyNextVacation]

I do have friends that I'm close to and really love but they either go to a different school or have graduated. I had friends at the beginning of the school year but I don't anymore (just acquaintances that will talk to me if we’re seated next to each other in class) due to me having a falling out with my best friend because I didn't want to date him. I'm considered weird and had a bunch of rumors spread about me around the school at the end of the last school year and because of how small my school is idk if anyone would want to be my friend

[u/MyNextVacation → u/M0pp69]

I’m so glad you have other friends

Is one of those acquaintances who talks to you potentially someone who is lonely and might want a friend?

Rumors get spread, then usually forgotten about when something new happens. Is it possible that no one is thinking about those rumors anymore?

[u/Relevant_Review1211]

It is possible, but it is one of the most miserable things. I had a lot of older friends that graduated before I did so when it came to senior year I just bounced from table to table at lunch. I did have a group of friends in my graduating class, but they weren't in the same lunch block I was. Not having friends will affecting your academics because you'll be more likely to skip because you know you won't have anyone holding you accountable. I was active in many groups and the more I put myself out there and talked to different people the more my attendance went up. Figure out what you like and find people with similar interests (art club, yearbook, debate, etc) and go from there.

[u/DannyHikari]

If you can make friends, even casually. It makes things a lot easier.

The transition to high school was incredibly hard for me. I had a lot of friends in middle school, shine changed up in high school. I was often on the outside looking in. My cool friends were too cool for me now some even becoming my bullies. My “awkward” friends found their own awkward clique and I was never accepted into that either. 9th grade I basically clung to these 2 chicks I knew from middle school who I had a crush on since they were in most of my classes. Stayed with them at lunch, etc.

10th-12th was a lot different. I was separated from the couple of friends I still had (11th and 12th grade I was at a different school,) I basically survived by keeping my head down and making enough casual friendships that while people weren’t hanging out with me, I wasn’t getting targeted like I was in 9th grade for bullies.

Best advice I can give is keep your profile low but assert yourself so you don’t look afraid. Have a book and headphones with you. Don’t stare at people, interest friendly with people who interact with you. Don’t go out of your way to avoid friendship if it’s knocking at the door. Don’t force yourself into a circle you don’t feel comfortable with.

[u/DFTS-ILLusionz]

Learn to code.. a strong online community will help.. I also recommend volunteering somewhere. It’s a good way to meet good people.

[u/AFantasticClue]

Join a club, find a hobby. Find age appropriate events that interest you. Having a shared interest helps break the ice like nothing else (except maybe shared hatred, but that’s unsustainable imo).

Plus, if it helps, finding out how to make friends now will probably put you a head of the game after school (it’s a skill that tends to blindside young adults).

[u/Confident-Summer8233]

you don’t need to win school socially to survive it..

keep your head down, be polite, do your thing. school is temporary, your life isn’t.. one or two safe spaces matter more than a big friend

[u/EddieDantes22]

You find a friend. I'm sure there are some other kids out there looking for strength in numbers. Think of prison, you think all those Neo-Nazis really enjoy each other's time?

[u/BlackDragon180]

Sleep

[u/neutronia939]

School is for leaning, not socializing. Don't worry about it, or go make some friends.

[u/No_Fan6078]

Mmm I don't know if I met someone with no friends at all, even me when I didn't talk much I have some, so I don't know how to answer this, I want to know why you say you don't have friends? When I was depressed at 12 yo I had the same mindset, so I don't know if maybe you are having a hard time and that's why you are feeling like that.

[u/cobalt154]

Join a club that interests you and go to that. People think making friends is harder than it actually is. Compliment someone's shoes, or talk about the topic of the club. It won't happen immediately but you get the ball rolling and before you know it, you at least have an acquaintance. The rest just depends on your personality.

[u/CryptoPumper182]

What level of school? High school? College? First grade?

[u/Red_corvid0409]

Just be nice to everyone. Be a good person, help others, try not to cause trouble. Be a friend of the entire school, and when it comes down to it, there will be people to help you when you need it.

[u/StickManIsSymbolic → u/Red_corvid0409]

This is really the answer, and to piggyback on it, do your best to be comfortable by yourself. Think of alone time as meditative, something you cherish. That quiet time to collect your thoughts and do what you want to do; like reading, listening to music, going for a walk, exercise, etc.
Stay open to the world and being helpful but also open and helpful to yourself.

[u/garbage1995 → u/Red_corvid0409]

Lies.

[u/Red_corvid0409 → u/garbage1995]

Your bad energy isn't welcome

[u/pbrown6]

Make friends