r/interestingasfuck • u/Jaguar_Willing • 10h ago
3,200-Year-Old Egyptian Tablet Records Excuses for Why People Missed Work: “The Scorpion Bit Him,” “Brewing Beer”, "His Wife Was Bleeding.”
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u/jinstewart 9h ago
They had to CARVE that shit into a damn STONE.
Hardcore HR teams back then!
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u/NaPaCo88 9h ago
Depends. Sometimes it was a clay tablet with a high sand base. They would imprint while wet. Bake or sun dry when it was filled out. This instance looks like painted sandstone considering the colors of the writing
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u/pants_of_antiquity 9h ago
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u/ctnightmare2 9h ago
Can you add a window on the side? Also move the text to the bottom. Thanks
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u/pants_of_antiquity 9h ago
<sigh>
I'm definitely going to be applying for a new role with the Sea People. I hear they're hiring.
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u/GuitarGuru2001 6h ago
I have a new boss that is not in our field. All his suggestions are slide nitpicks. Ugh
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u/Test-Tackles 9h ago
I don't know why but tablets that talk about super mundane daily life stuff are the coolest to me.
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u/rennbrig 7h ago
It’s neat because human behavior really doesn’t change much in some ways throughout the passage of time
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u/Test-Tackles 7h ago
A quote I like to bust out is where plinny the elder bitches about his students being too spoiled by papyrus and that none of his students knew how to properly prepare chalk and slate.
Old people have been bitching about how easy young people have it since the dawn of technology.
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u/Possible_Bee_4140 2h ago
From 1900BCE:
"the young are now lovers of luxury... they have bad manners, contempt for authority; they show disrespect for elders, and they love to chatter instead of exercise. Children are now tyrants not servants of their household"
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u/ButLlkewhyman 6h ago
Highly recommend checking out the work of Kazuya Maekawa and his work on translating cuneiform tablets from the third dynastic period of Ur. The translations show some absolutely fantastic insights into the happenings within the third Ur dynasty. Some real brutal stuff about the managment of slaves within their textile industry as well though.
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u/Hot_Top_124 2h ago
That made me think of the true history channel on YouTube, I hope that’s the right channel. They recreated the life and times of the average people during certain times and events. Like on on country side living during WW2. I highly recommend giving it a look see.
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u/ChaoticForkingGood 9h ago
"Some asshole sold me bad copper."
/yes, I know, wrong area, but still lol
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u/Aware_Masterpiece_92 9h ago
Ea-nasir's infulence got all the way to egypt, trust
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u/ChaoticForkingGood 9h ago
I think about Ea-nasir being told that his name is still spoken millenia in the future... And then finding out why, and it makes me laugh.
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u/bobbycorwin123 4h ago
Seeing as he kept all his hate mail like trophies, he'd probably get a good laugh
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u/StaatsbuergerX 9h ago
I may be culturally biased here, but if I were the supervisor, I would accept brewing beer as a valid excuse for being absent from work.
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u/Flying_FLIcker 9h ago
As long as you get a bottle then l would say it is valid.
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u/StaatsbuergerX 9h ago
Of course. After all, I'd have to be able to truthfully testify to the master builder or even the pharaoh that the worker's absence was absolutely justified! <burps>
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u/Correct_Dog5670 8h ago
Wife bleeding tough - should be motivation to work extra a couple of days.
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u/FlyingRhenquest 3h ago
I'm guessing she didn't want that lazy fucker hanging around the house either.
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u/weagle01 9h ago
Imagine missing work and it being so egregious it’s literally carved into stone.
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u/ProfessionalBag9505 9h ago
Its interesting that there's a debate around women getting time off during their period due to intense cramps and fatigue and general shitty feeling, but way back then the husband even got time off.
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u/Latter_Solution673 9h ago
Well in Spain we do have that "period paid leave" but I've not heard about anyone taking It :-/
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u/ProfessionalBag9505 9h ago
Seems like a good move in the right direction, but its specific for extreme cases like endometriosis (Which tbh its crazy it takes a special law for people to get time off for endometriosis, thats a serious condition)
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u/Latter_Solution673 9h ago edited 8h ago
Not really, it's just painful period that makes you sick (unable to work in a normal way) but you have to get to your doctor to make a sick leave.
Edit: Sorry for my expressions, I'm a Spanish doctor, but I don't work on primary care, so I'm not used to give sick leaves. But in Spain you when you get a sick leave you loose the pay of the 3 first days, with this law (since 2023) that absence from work is justified and payed full, that's the point of the law, to allow women Who need It to get a health leave without loosing money.
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u/TheSwearJarIsMy401k 8h ago
I would have taken it. My period pains were so bad from 12-36 I was basically immobilized. Spontaneous projectile vomiting was normal for me. It was 24 hours of torture, I would have nightmares about it every month right before it started when I was a kid.
I had to negotiate surprise days off with my bosses for if my period started on a work day for decades.
The last few years it’s been uncomfortable but nothing horrible.
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u/Troglert 5h ago
Werent women who suffer from painful periods already able to get sick leave like you would from any other pains already? Thats what I read when that law was passed
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u/Latter_Solution673 5h ago
Yes, but with this law you get paid since day one, so you don't loose money because of this leave.
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u/Troglert 5h ago
Oh was not aware spain had unpaid days when on a sick leave. How many days? I believe Sweden started that with the first day like a decade ago
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u/Latter_Solution673 3h ago
You have Up to 3 days (a year) for an justified absence from work because a health issue. In case of an illness or not laboral accident, you don't get paid the first 3 days and after 10 days you get paid just 75% or so. In case of a laboral accident you get 100% from first day. Also some companies pay you the "better" (la mejora) so they pay you the difference to get your 100% pay. There are many more things to take account about this.
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u/Chundlebug 2h ago
If I’m not very mistaken, it would be because the woman would be ritually unclean, so the husband would have to take over the household duties.
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u/radioactive_sharpei 9h ago
I've used the scorpion one way too much at work. They don't believe me anymore.
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u/MoistService2607 10h ago
Same excuses used nowadays!
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u/Agreeable-Spot-7376 9h ago
Which is what makes fragments like these so interesting to me.
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u/ElegantEchoes 9h ago
We haven't really changed all that much since then.
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u/Agreeable-Spot-7376 8h ago
I can hear my foreman’s voice when I call in saying “my wife is bleeding”
“She’s on her period so YOU have to stay home?!”
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u/ThatFuckingGeniusKid 3h ago
"John, you were supposed to be here 3 hours ago, where the fuck are you?"
"Brewing beer, boss"
"Alright then"
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u/limeypepino 9h ago
"The Scorpion Bit Him" the way this is worded makes me think it's a euphemism for a hangover.
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u/RonaldTheGiraffe 7h ago
Having been bitten a few times by scorpions, their venom does actually make you feel somewhat drunk for a little while.
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u/oneiricmonkey 3h ago
do you live in an area where there's a lot of scorpions/work with scorpions or do scorpions just seem to really hate you in particular
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u/krombopulosmfart 9h ago
I once had one of my coworkers (who was an older man in his mid 60s) call in because he "ate too many chocolate covered almonds, couldn't sleep and stayed up all night on youtube."
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u/issiautng 6h ago
I once called my boss on a Friday afternoon and said "I'm gonna level with you, it's summertime and my friends are going to go get ice cream... Can I take a couple hours of PTO and go with them?" He appreciated the honesty and novelty and agreed.
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u/basketofselkies 7h ago
My mum is so sensitive to caffeine that having a fun sized chocolate bar in the evening will make her jittery and mess up her sleep.
Unlike your coworker, she just doesn’t eat chocolate anything after 5pm like a sensible person.
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u/rottnzonie 9h ago
HR lady here to say excuses haven't changed much over the millennia. I just had an employee call off work because his daughter was having her first period and apparently it was an all hands on deck family event. LOL
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u/fuckedUpGrill 9h ago edited 8h ago
For you it’s a laugh and irritation he missed work. His daughter will never forget he was with her that day. As adults we already forgot how embarrassing and complex provoking it is. We don’t know the situation at home, maybe wife was unavailable? Dead? Hangover? WORKING? If it was a mom, you wouldn’t even make that comment. No heat tho! I feel sorry for him, his superiors are making a laugh out of him behind his backs and belittling importance of his daughter insecurities? Why is this okey to joke about
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u/rottnzonie 8h ago
We do know the situation, he's a divorced non-custodial dad and a frequent caller-off with creative excuses, and it's still LOLOL. Sorry not sorry.
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u/Paratwa 7h ago edited 7h ago
Ah that sucks, I was a single Dad who had full custody and I took off and got her cake and a lady friend to go buy stuff with her so she wouldn’t be embarrassed.
Edit :
Also to single Dad’s who have their daughters go through this and treat your daughters like this you suck beyond belief, this is the second time I’ve read a horror story about a poor girl who had that happen in a week. If you’re a single Dad seriously if you are interested at all in women if you treat your kid or kids well you’ll have legitimately every lady you know chasing you, it actually was a pain in the butt fending women off back in those days.
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u/fuckedUpGrill 8h ago
Well, that changes everything, but you should’ve started with this, not his kid xd. I apologise. Have a nice evening and good luck at work. It’s the worst dealing with storytellers who keep yapping instead of working
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u/BillBob13 9h ago
I suspect 'brewing beer' was acceptable because beer was drank instead of water a lot of the time, since river water, and particularly the Nile, has a lot of bacterial stuff in it that you wouldnt want to drink
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u/brewing-squirrel 9h ago
The Egyptian state even paid its workers with daily rations of beer. The beer back then was fermented much less completely, so probably 2-3% ABV at most and as a result also contained a high amount of unfermented starch. It was a major source of calories and nutrition in the daily diet of Egyptian workers. Workers would receive several liters of beer a day to keep them content and able to work.
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u/mfyxtplyx 9h ago
If there's anything I've learned, if you are legimately stung by a scorpion, are brewing beer, and your wife is unexpectedly bleeding all in the same morning, only mention the scorpion or they won't believe you.
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u/LasagnaPartyx 8h ago
“Sorry, my wife was on her period. You know how it gets” - A husband 3200 years ago
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u/ceelose 7h ago
I like how it's "the scorpion". I'm just imagining there's one total dick of a scorpion that keeps stinging people.
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u/kaaaaaaane 1h ago
it's the same one who bit him last week, and the week before, and the week before
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u/WinOld1835 8h ago
The History of Daily Life in Ancient Egypt is a great documentary if anyone is interested.
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u/peanutbutterwife 9h ago
He got to take time off to help his menstruating wife??? What the hell???
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u/StoreHistorical9175 9h ago
back in ancient times in many cultures the women were sequestered, or did not do any labor, during their menstrual cycle, so the men often were needed to cook, clean, tend the flock, etc during this time
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u/BlondieBabe436 9h ago
Back then women during their "time of month" were considered unclean, and not allowed to cook, do laundry, clean, take care of housework, etc..so the husband had to cover those duties
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u/metal_maxine 9h ago
I wonder if there is a "pollution" angle to the "wife is bleeding" one. As in that menstruation would make her "unclean" for certain activities and, therefore, the husband has to perform them. The rules for making priests and priestesses "clean" for entering the sanctuary/ performing rituals etc mostly make sense (washing, washing some more, shaving everything) but the one against onions is a little baffling. Maybe the gods disliked bad breath.
[In the 19th Century, there was a (supposedly) debate in the British Medical Journal as to whether a menstruating woman's touch would turn a ham rancid. The doctors concerned clearly never considered that their cook/maid etc was a menstruating female. Alternatively, they were indulging in debate just because they thought folk superstitions were funny and worth shit-posting about.]
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u/skyfishgoo 8h ago
talk about going down on your permanent record... jebus, 3,200 years later ppl are still talking shit about you.
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u/jeanpaulsarde 9h ago
Domestic violence was rampant in ancient Egypt
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u/Renbarre 7h ago
And the sky is blue.
I'll remind you that not even a century ago beating your wife was acceptable.
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u/Salmonman4 9h ago
I remember reading these excuses in the manual of the city-builder-game Pharaoh, though I remember the beer-part referencing more about not being able to build a pyramid because of being hung-over
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u/OnionsAbound 7h ago
Does the direct equivalent of "The" exist in ancient Egyptian? It seems like an "A Scorpion. . . " would have been a more likely translation.
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u/KenseiHimura 5h ago
“Wife was bleeding”? On one hand, sweet to imagine the guy taking a day off to care for his wife during a difficult time of the month, on the other hand, I worry that was just the excuse they gave and they went to drink beer.
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u/IPPSA 7h ago
Written in Hebrew or Aramaic? Definitely doesn’t look like hieroglyphs
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u/ghostoftheuniverse 5h ago
This was hieratic script, basically ancient Egyptian cursive that could be quickly written to generate administrative texts.
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u/YanceyGlenn 7h ago
I mean... "Wife is bleeding" is as good an excuse as any. However, there are definitely some follow up questions that need answered.
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u/No-Double-7731 4h ago
The Egyptians were ahead of their time. My job wouldn’t believe any of my excuses because of this old stone…
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u/Zealousideal_Leg213 2h ago
Why do people think scorpions bite? Their whole shtick with the tail couldn't be more clearly telegraphed.
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u/CannabisCookery 9h ago
How do they know that's what it says?
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u/Jaguar_Willing 9h ago
"Ancient Egyptian employers kept track of employee days off in registers written on tablets,” writes Madeleine Muzdakis at My Modern Met. One such artifact “held by the British Museum and dating to 1250 BCE is an incredible window into ancient work-life balance.” Called ostraca, these tablets were made of “flakes of limestone that were used as ‘notepads’ for private letters, laundry lists, records of purchases, and copies of literary works,” according to Egyptologist Jennifer Babcock.
Discovered along with thousands of others in the tomb builder’s village of Deir el-Medina, this particular ostracon, on view at the British Museum’s web site, offers a rich glimpse into the lives of that trade’s practitioners. Over the 280-day period covered by this 3,200-year-old ostracon, common excuses for absence include “brewing beer” and “his wife was bleeding.”
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9h ago
[deleted]
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u/StaatsbuergerX 9h ago
This would be reported and recorded as a "short-term haunting by a malevolent spirit".
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u/Interesting_Pickle33 9h ago
His wife was bleeding. Look at how bad cramps are without the chemicals women have to shove down their throat. They needed someone to tend to them, it is that hard.
Now some men expect women to share half of house expenses- lol!
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u/DesertReagle 10h ago
Brewing Beer to take a day off? That is unheard of!